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  • This one really came home for me from the last couple of weeks and I know there are many out there who suffer from stress

    So what is stress?

    One of the literal definitions is a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or demanding circumstances.

    Though it may be obvious the cause of the stress sometimes we need to take a step back and have a look at what really is the problem

    Have we just bitten off more than we could chew?

    Are we unsure of what to do?

    Let’s be honest here sometimes even if we are aware of what is making us stress we may not always be able to change the situation.

    Yes, we can implement things that may make any situation less stressful and change our thinking on the subject. Is that really solving the issue or is it just pushing it aside to another day

    Personally I believe stress can be good in small doses as it can challenge you and help you grow. What happens when you are living on stress?

    Then that is not healthy, if you are constantly stressed you may find yourself getting sick more often, you are drained, you do not have the energy required to do what you have to, your muscles in your back are tight with tension and massages are no help.

    I understand that sometimes you cannot control the stress or the situation so here is where I would suggest balancing it out.

    If you say you can’t change the situation or how you are feeling this is where I will challenge you and ask is that really the case?

    Let’s say work is the cause of this stress and you have been overloaded with all these tasks you have to complete by 5pm that day, people keep coming requesting you do this that and everything else on top of your normal tasks; are you not at fault for not speaking up?

    In most cases if the above scenario were to occur the stress employee usually won’t speak up and then all of a sudden they are handing in there resignation as they simply cannot handle it any longer. Sound familiar?

    So here is where I will ask what would happen if you were to speak up and say something?

    Just because you stand up for yourself and stick your ground does not mean you are complaining. I need to clarify that, as many view as standing up for oneself and saying no as a compliant. I need to stress that it is not, it is however looking after you and looking out for the most important person in your life.

    Speaking up and saying something can provide you with alternate opportunities that you never considered before. It’s like they say you never know until you ask and you have to be in it to win it.

    So what’s the reason behind hiding yourself away, not looking out for you, not speaking up for yourself and putting yourself out of the game because you are trying to fit someone else’s version of perfect.

     I find that I stress when I am trying to conform to others beliefs, and trying to into their puzzle and can never find the correct space to slot into. I don’t mind some stress as I do use it as a motivator for many things, it may not be ideal for others, for me it works.

    I do not like the stress that drains you dry and you want to do nothing but collapse. This is the stress I’m talking about.

    I can tell you no matter how much you believe there is nothing you can do to change the situation, there is always something you can do.

    Some people like to listen to music, colour in, meditate, go home and have a glass of wine an destress using some form of relaxation.

    Is this always ideal? I know when I am extremely stressed I do not have the energy to pick myself to consider colouring and even to turn some music on. All I want to do is sleep.

    Now sleep obviously can be a big cure to stress, if you are not sleeping enough getting more rest can help ease the tension. Sometimes sleep may be all you need.

    It’s when the stress is constant and ongoing that becomes a problem. That’s where you really need to find what is causing the stress and ask yourself can anything be done to repair the situation. For instance if it is a job that is stressing you out, will leaving solve the problem or is it just a case of the grass is greener on the other side. You believe that if you were to obtain a job elsewhere you wouldn’t be stressed, and then 6 months later you find yourself in a similar situation which caused you to leave the other place?

    This is where I will advise that the stress is a lot deeper and what you are thinking you are stressed about isn’t really the thing that is causing the stress.

    It does come down to understanding yourself, knowing what makes you tick and what you can do to help the situation.

    So what destresses you?

    What can you do, to enjoy life and not be riddled with stress?

    I think you also need to ask yourself if this stress is helping you and if it has a purpose. Listen to yourself, if something does not seem right, your body is usually the first to know. The body has many wonderful ways of how to communicate with us and this stress could be a way of sending you a message.

    Understanding the stress can require soul searching, and it’s my belief that a solution can only be found once the problem has been identified.

    Spend some time reflecting on what is really going on.

    Do whatever destresses you; whether that’s tuning out of the world for a while, listening to music, meditating, art, reading, writing, talking, just simple relaxation etc, you name it.

    Always make time for yourself, in today’s world it is easy to forget about us and to take a step back just to reflect. We are living in a fast paced world that no longer shuts off. One curse of the internet and electronics; everything is always on

    Do what makes you happy and live for you.

    If you can do the above, you may find that life is really peaceful. Remember life is what you make it.